Top Netflix movies to watch 2025 🔥
🚨 TRUST ME, YOU CAN’T UNSEE THIS
(My cousin’s boyfriend hacked Netflix’s “Binge Watch” server. We’re all going to jail.)
🔟 “THE PLATFORM”
Why it’s SUS: Inmates in Ohio sued Netflix for “giving them ideas.” 💀
9️⃣ “BIRD BOX”
ER nurses HATE it: “Karens keep blindfolding themselves and walking into traffic!” 🚦🙈
8️⃣ “DON’T LOOK UP”
NASA leaked: The “DiCaprio” asteroid? REAL. Arrives 2027. Pack snacks. 🍿☄️
7️⃣ “GLASS ONION”
Divorce lawyers LOVE it: “Best. Marketing. Ever.” (412 couples split “solving” partner lies.) 💔🔍
6️⃣ “THE GRAY MAN”
CIA agent DM’d me: “Delete this. Ryan Gosling’s ‘tricks’ are CLASSIFIED.” ✉️🔐
⚠️ TOP 5? GOVERNMENTS TRIED TO BAN THESE ⚠️
5️⃣ “ALL QUIET ON THE WESTERN FRONT”
BANNED in Germany for causing “public sobbing riots.” (They weren’t wrong.) 🇩🇪😭
4️⃣ “RRR”
EMTs warned us: “Stop doing the tiger dance in Walmart. PLEASE.” 🐅💃
3️⃣ “THE IRISHMAN”
Actual mob bosses: “DeNiro ratted out our retirement plans!” 👴🔫
2️⃣ “EXTRACTION 2”
Chris Hemsworth’s wife: “I locked him in the basement until he promised to STOP SETTING HIMSELF ON FIRE.” 🔥😤
🚨 AND #1… SWEET BABY JESUS.
1️⃣ “MORBIUS”
Why Netflix is being SUED:
Viewers enter a “MORBIUS TRANCE”—wake up chanting “IT’S MORBIN’ TIME!” 🧛⚡
GOVERNMENT WARNING: “May cause sudden vampirism urges and reality distortion.” 🧪
THE CURSED CUT: Jared Leto WINKED AT 1:07:23. 
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